I migrated to Canada a year ago. I was living with my boyfriend of two and a half years in Jamaica. Everything seemed fine until everything took a turn for the worst. He had a busy work schedule for about two weeks so I backed off. Even though it was killing me, I still gave him his space. Now that he's not busy anymore, I demanded my attention by expressing myself to him in an emotional manner. I told him I missed him and all he could do was curse me to shame. He's now telling me that he needs his space, and I should lay off. We were having some problems before and I told him I was going to come to Jamaica to try and work things out with him. He said I should stay because I would only be wasting my time and money.

The only man I love

Pastor, what he doesn't understand is that he's my best friend. I love him and he's the one I intend to settle down with. The distance between us is also very stressful. I don't know if I'm being too demanding or if I'm asking him for too much. I honestly don't know what to do. It feels like I'm losing the only friend I have and the only man I love. I don't know my birth father very well because he walked out on me a long time ago. If my boyfriend thinks he can do the same thing to me, he is making a sad mistake.

S. S., Ontario, Canada

Dear S. S.,

Cool it. Don't threaten the man. That won't do any good. I'll try to tell you as softly as I can what you should do. This man doesn't care about the relationship. He has already told you that coming to Jamaica wouldn't help to cement the both of you together. You would be wasting your money. So don't even think about that. What you need to do now is to ask the good Lord to help you to overcome his rejection.

Give yourself time for your heart to heal. You may think right now that he is the best man for you, but his behaviour proves otherwise. Pray and ask God to keep you in your right mind and not to allow you to become ill. If you try to hold on to this man, you will become very depressed. Read your Bible, go to church. Talk to your friends when you come home from work. Call them on the phone and chat. Don't waste your time calling this man. If you do, you will become very frustrated. Leave him alone.

Pastor