DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM? IS SOMETHING BOTHERING YOU? WRITE TO: TELL ME PASTOR, DR. AARON DUMAS, P.O. BOX 188, KING STREET, KINGSTON. TELEPHONE: 929-1667/8. E-MAIL: PASTOR@JAMAICASTAR.COM. OR, VISIT MY WEBSITE AT DEARPASTOR.COM

Dear Pastor,

I am a 25-year-old female who is involved in two relationships. One of the guys is my personal boyfriend who lives in the United States. He is divorced. At the time we met, he was separated from his wife for over a year. He says he loves me and I have seen him do things for me that no one has ever done.

The other guy is living in Jamaica and he is married. We have been involved with each other for the last three years. He is kind to me. The problem I have is that this guy is possessive and jealous. I can't have friends, especially male friends. He knows about my other guy in the States. He watches me a lot, even when my guy is here on visits.

Broke into my house

He sneaks around my house and listens in on our conversations. He even broke into my house and went through my dirty clothes. His wife knows about us. He is really a nice guy, which makes it hard for me to let go. Please tell me what to do.

Z.G., St James, Jamaica

Dear Z.G.,

A nice guy going through your dirty clothes, unbelievable! What is he looking for? Why don't you admit that this man is nasty and that you don't have any ambition? If you love him so much, you are just like him. Both of you are shameless, that is one of the reasons both of you have stayed together for so long - you are two of a kind. Imagine a man breaking into your house to go through your dirty clothes! The man is sick! He needs professional help.

You say this man knows about the other man who lives in the States and the one who is living in the States is divorced. Why don't you just settle down with the man in the States? There must be reasons for your tolerating the nasty man. Don't you have any shame? He obviously doesn't have any.

Pastor