I am a Jamaican living in the United States for some time now. I have one question to ask, is it really possible to please a woman? Personally, I don't think it is. If you give them what they want, that still doesn't satisfy them. At times I don't even believe they themselves know what they want.

If you give them "this", they want "that" and if you give them "that", they want "this." And if you give them "this and that", they want "this, that and the other".

I am a man who doesn't cheat, because I think cheating is not only wrong, but that cheating is for boys and I am a big man. I can't bother with the lying and hiding, but still I get accused every other day that I am cheating.

Little sex

Pastor, I am 41 years old. I have been there and I have done that when I was younger and it didn't get me anywhere, but into trouble. And back then I wasn't being accused half as much as I am been accused now. All another woman out there can give me, is a little sex every now and then, with a bag of headache; who needs that? But my wife doesn't seem to understand that. She thinks because I have a strong sex drive, as soon as she turns her back, I am having sex with someone else. I am tired of it. This is my second marriage. I messed the first one up and I have been doing everything right in this one, but it doesn't seem to be worth it. My wife and I have sex everyday whenever it's possible, but yet she still thinks I am cheating. Good God, I am not a Bionic Man.

Female friends

I pay all the bills in the house with no problem. I take care of her two kids as I would my own. I don't keep female friends. We do everything together. I don't even party, because I am not missing anything out there and I still have to go through all of this. We tried counselling a few times and things got better for a week or two, then back to the same old thing.

What else can I do, Pastor?

J. W., New York, USA

Dear J. W.,

You know that your wife believes that you love to have sex, so if both of you are not together, you must be having sex with another woman. It must be stressful dealing with such a jealous wife, but you must make sure that you do not allow what she is accusing you of cause you to become so fed up and end the marriage. Live in hope that she might change. Don't take her on. She likes to see you on the defensive. She enjoys how you always have to assure her that you are not taking other women to bed. By the way, I am serious about this. You have to give this woman more sex. Do it, then rest, then do it again until she begs you to stop. When she accuses you of going with other women, that is her way of telling you that she wants more sex.

Pastor