Dear Pastor,

I am a 33-year-old woman. I have been married to a 50-year-old man for 13 years. The problem is that I was never in love with him, but through religion I have tried to stay married to him. When I finally told him I wanted to leave he threatened to commit suicide. My mother said his blood would be on my shoulders, so I stayed. I have two children for him, but my heart was still empty. I started to have affairs just to fill the void. I am tired of doing that because the only person that gets hurt is me. Recently, I came to Jamaica and met up with a childhood friend; the way he makes me feel I don't want to let him go.

Pastor, how do I let go of my marriage and finally be happy? I just want to be happy and not feel guilty.

M. C., USA

Dear M. C.,

I am sorry you got married to a man you do not love. I don't know how religion caused you to get married to a man you do not love. I am sure that you have tried to love him, but you have come to realise that it is impossible for you to force yourself to love him. A woman may pretend for a while that she loves a man, but the time will come when she has to face the facts and tell the man the truth.

Giving up on luxury

A woman who doesn't love a man may give up all the luxury that he has provided for her to go with a man she loves, even if he is poor. I am not, therefore, surprised that you are emotionally involved with another man.

Pastor