Dear Pastor,

I am a 22-year-old man who is from Jamaica, but I now live in the USA. I am having a problem. I want to settle down, but I don't know how to keep one girl. Everytime I meet a girl I really care about I always end up cheating on her and after we sleep together for a few times my feelings just change from her and I don't know why. I am at the point where I really want to settle down and change my life, but I am a bit scared that all the things that I did in the past will come back to haunt me in the future. Plus these days true love is hard to find because some of the ladies love you for what you have and what you can do for them and not for who you really are. So right now I am a bit confused.

Pastor, please give me your input on this.

O. B., New York, USA

Dear O. B.,

I would like to ask you what true love is. You seem to be mixing up lust and love. Sex is the primary thing on your mind when you meet a girl. And after you have used her and feel you have had enough, you drop her. If you have loved her, you would have stayed with her. You wouldn't have found it easy to walk away from her.

Lust is fleshy and only after sex. Love esteems highly and is kind, patient and long-suffering. Lust is selfish and self-seeking. Love seeks the good of the other person. If you are only thinking about satisfying yourself, you have never been in love.

Pastor