Dear Pastor,
I've been living with my boyfriend for two years. Before that, he lived with his wife. We were still very intimate. I didn't know anything about the marriage until a few months before we moved in together. He told me that he got married because he wanted the opportunity to go abroad. Anyway, he is still married and is aimlessly dealing with his divorce issues. Whenever I ask him about it, he says he's broke. Before we moved in, he told his wife everything about my personal life and had the nerve to tell me that she overheard everything on his cellphone. How do I know this? His wife used it against me during a confrontation.
Pastor, do you know the worst thing about this? I stopped talking to my family because of him. A few months ago, we were broke, so he told me he was going to borrow some money from his brethren. I became suspicious and called a girl I knew he visits quite often. To my surprise, he was there.
Hurtful
He got so angry and started to curse me in the most hurtful and disrespectful way in front of the female. This man has humiliated me in so many ways and I still love him. I always allow him to come back. I've tried to leave, but I can't.
Do you think I'm too kind-hearted or am I stupid?
J.D., Hanover, Jamaica
Dear J.D.,
I don't believe that a woman should continue having an intimate relationship with a man who lies to her about his marital status. You did not know that this man was married when you met him and while you were going to bed with him. He is a deceiver and if he can lie to you about his marital status, he will lie to you about his financial position, his health and other important matters.
Too often, men use the excuse of having business wedding to get the other women to believe them. These women are given the impression that the men will shortly be divorced and marry them. Some women have been waiting for many years, but the men have not sought to legally end their marriages.
This man is disrespectful to you and you should not trust him. You should seek to get out of this relationship as soon as possible.
Pastor
Do
you have a problem? Is something bothering
you? Write to