Dear Pastor,

I have been reading your column and I am hoping that you can help me. I am a 22-year-old young woman who is living in the United Kingdom, but originally I am from Jamaica. My problem is that while I was living in Jamaica, I fell in love with a guy who I believe is my soul mate. Some people might say that we were too young, but we dated for a few months, then unfortunately my family moved here. I have been living here for the past eight years.

Kept in touch

We kept in touch and told each other how much we loved each other and that there was no one else.

I returned to Jamaica last Christmas to visit friends and family. While I was there we saw each other. The moment I laid eyes on him again I knew that my feelings were the same as the day I met him. I was in love all over again. We slept together on the first day, then almost every day after.

Four months pregnant

About a week later, he told me that he has a girlfriend who is four months pregnant. I was so upset, but I couldn't afford to lose him. He told me that he was still with her because she was pregnant. We spoke about it and decided that we would stay together and he would stay with his girlfriend also. She found my number in his phone and kept on calling me and saying nasty things which I did not deserve.

He then told me that they had broken up. I felt badly, but I loved him too much to think about how she felt. When I returned home to the United Kingdom, she kept calling me and texting me saying lots of nasty things. I didn't answer them because I understood how she might have felt.

But after awhile, she kept telling me that they are still together and that he was using me. So I called him and asked him about it. He told me that they were back together for the sake of the baby.

I broke it off with him, but was that the right thing to do? I can't stop thinking about him. Everytime we speak, he keeps asking me if when I come back to Jamaica if I will sleep with him.

Please, help me.

M.T., United Kingdom

Dear M.T.,

You did the right thing by ending the relationship. And I hope that you will be strong enough not to go to bed with him whenever you visit Jamaica.

He is really interested in having sex with you. That's why he is asking you whether you will sleep with him when you return to Jamaica. He is not a man of principle. Don't allow him to use you anymore.

Pastor