Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you because I am confused about my relationship with my ex-boyfriend. We were in a relationship for five years and for the past two years we have been having problems. I think he is cheating on me, but he said he is not cheating, yet he can't explain the text messages in his phone. I can tell that he still has feelings for me. He told me that he would like to marry me some day, but before he can do that he needs to know that he is making the right choice. He suggested that we needed space for him to see what he wanted.

He went to Jamaica for two weeks. We made plans to meet in Montego Bay for the weekend of my birthday. He called me the morning before he left for Jamaica. The only problem was that he never called me on my birthday or came to see me. He said he didn't have any money to call me. I never thought that this guy would do this to me or hurt me. He didn't know the amount of money I spent to meet him in Jamaica for that day.

When he came back from Jamaica, I acted like nothing was wrong and that I was okay with what happened. I told him that I loved him but right now I just wanted to be his friend. He agreed to that. We still see each other and have sex with each other. To me, it seems like he is still in love with me and he is as confused as I am. I think that he has a woman in Jamaica, but I never asked him. The text messages and voice mails from the woman seem to tell me that they do have something going. But he said that they are just friends. I live here and she lives in Jamaica, so I shouldn't be worrying about that.

Although we agreed to be friends, we still argue about what is happening between us. Sometimes he thinks it is best not to be friends since it's so painful or so he says. He told me that if we were really meant to be together, we will find our way back to each other. I am confused because I still wanted to be in a relationship with him, but on the other hand, I wanted him to have his space so that he could see and really know what he wants in life.

Please shine some light on this for me. We just broke up about three weeks ago and next month we would have been together for six years.

L.H., George Town, Grand Cayman

Dear L.H.,

I don't want you to misunderstand me, but I am going to talk to you straight. I believe that you mean well and that you are very much in love with this young man. I don't have any doubt in my mind about that. But baby, take my word, this man doesn't love you. He loves what you can give to him and that is sex, but he is making a fool of you.

The guy behaved as if a dog ate his conscience. He had you fly to Montego Bay to be with him on your birthday and he didn't show up, neither did he call you. But you know what is shocking, was that you continued to be intimate with him and listened to all his lies. He doesn't care about you. He is no good and it is time for you to see that. Let him go his way. It is time for you to realise that some men are nothing but users. You deserve better.

Pastor