Dear Pastor,

In regard to the article you wrote recently titled 'Phase three'. I think you cannot just tell persons to leave their relationships like that. The guy had a fantasy which was not satisfied. Now, you could have suggested that he goes for counselling, but instead you told the woman to leave the man because he wants a threesome. Everybody likes different ways of sex. It's just that this guy chose something that the wife doesn't want but he was honest enough to tell her his feelings.

So, Pastor, you can't use one or two paragraphs to tell persons to leave their relationships where they could have been happy. How do you feel about the relationships you have broken up with your advice from a few sentences someone writes? I pray for you, Pastor, and hope God guides you. I can tell you now though, a number of people are crying because of your advice.

A.B., St. James, Jamaica

Dear A.B.,

I am glad you are praying for me. I wish more people would. I can assure you, however, that every case is dealt with on its own merit and I make no apology for telling some couples that they ought to go their separate ways. Not all relationships can work, so stop kidding yourself by believing that I don't have the right to tell a couple that in my opinion they should bring an end their relationship.

When a man is physically abusing his woman and cutting her and threatening to kill her, should she stay with him? When a man is not supporting his family and has other women and is giving his money to them instead, and the children cannot go to school and the water and light are disconnected, should she stay with him? Should she kneel and pray in the dark, or move on? Well, I am going to tell you that she shouldn't stay in such a relationship. Curse me as much as you want, I will say what I believe a counsellor should say.

Women who have had the courage to leave men who are irresponsible or wicked are better off doing so. You said that I have broken up relationships because of my counselling. If I have opened the eyes of couples, I am happy. If you know any woman who has left her husband or any man who has left his wife because of what I have said and they regret doing so, send me their names or let them write to me.

You know what, I have a feeling that you are just running your mouth. You don't know what you are talking about. A counsellor should not encourage a couple to stay together if a spouse's life is in danger, and sometimes it is better to separate even if it is just for a time.

May I suggest that you read the letter from the woman who wrote to me about the threesome and her husband's life and look again at my response and judge what I have said and the foolishness you have written.

Pastor