Dear Pastor,

I must say to you that you are doing a remarkable job. I'm a regular reader of your column and I am always delighted by your remarks. I'm a 23-year-old man and my partner is 35. My partner and I have been dating for three years now and we are happily in love. I really want your view on this type of relationship. My parents now accept my girlfriend and her family somewhat understands, but they are not totally in agreement. I know I love my girlfriend and some day I'll marry her.

There are just a few problems that I have with my girlfriend. She nags me at times, telling me that I might leave her for someone younger. If I'm driving or walking and someone dares to stare at me, it causes a problem. She is too aggressive and doesn't have any temper control. When she's angry, she is quick to collar me or hurt me. I know she loves me dearly because she shows me and she takes pretty good care of me. I can talk to her when I am having problems. She is everything a man wants in a woman, but her jealousy for me is annoying at times. There are times people would share ideas about someone's physical features or attire, but I can't do that. If a female passes and I say I like her dress or shoes, she starts accusing me of all sorts of things.

I want to open up to her. I'm very honest with her so I don't see why we can't reason about anything. I love this woman and whatever we do, we put God first.

Pastor, do you think I'm making the right decision by settling with someone who is 12 years older than I am? She has children and I have none. What are the implications two to three years from now? I know I love this woman to death but people are always disagreeing on this matter. Jamaicans on a whole, think that women who date younger men are wrong. It's accepted globally if a young girl dates an older man, so why can't people face it that age is just a number?

May God continue to bless you and keep up the good work.

D. H., St. Mary, Jamaica

Dear D. H.,

You claim that this woman is the type of woman all men would love to have, but judging from what you have written, it is not so. This woman considers you to be a little boy, one that she can spank anytime she wishes to do so. She is insecure and that is because of the age difference. If you believe that you are in love with her and she is in love with you and that both of you would love to get married, I suggest that both of you make an appointment to see a family counsellor so that both of you can get guidance.

My dear, sir, I hope that this woman will also inform the counsellor that she needs help in anger management.

Pastor