Dear Pastor,

I enjoy reading your letters and I believe in your advice. I am 34 and my girlfriend is 45. We have been together for more than four years and she has never bought me a bottle of roll-on, much less a shirt. I am the father of two children ages 11 and 12. Their mother died some 10 years ago and my mother is the one who takes care of them. The thing is that I take care of all her bills. She works Monday to Friday and I never ask her for a cent. Both of us live in St. Catherine. She does not spend any time with me. My family loves and respects her.

She has five children, four of whom live with her. The eldest is 27 while the youngest is 13. Every weekend I visit her home. Her family loves and respects me. Whenever I buy her clothes including underwear, she wears everything else except the underwear.

Pastor, I was once a wild man. Three and four women a day. Since I met her, I have changed and it's because of her. Probably I should go back to my wild ways. Please keep up the good work and God bless you.

F.P., St. Catherine Jamaica.

Dear F.P.,

This woman doesn't have much time for you if she works so hard during the week and has children to support. Both of you have to learn to compromise and to make time for each other. It is unfortunate that she does not buy you gifts, not even on special days. Such a woman is likely to 'bleed' you and make you poorer. If you are taking care of all her bills, her account should be very 'fat.'

Where do you want this relationship to go? Sir, to be very frank with you, I think you are behaving as a very simple man and perhaps this woman is using you. One of these days when she can do without you, you are likely to hear that she has a new man in her life and you would be left hanging. Why don't you call it a day and move on with your life?

Pastor