DEAR PASTOR,
I am the eldest child for both my parents. However, my father was never active in my life. When I was about ten years of age, I met this guy who claimed he was my brother, which would be my father's son. When I confronted my father and grandmother, they both disowned the boy. I have grown to accept him as a part of my family and occasionally helped him when I can.
OPEN AND STRAIGHT
A few weeks ago, his mother passed away and that was the last time I asked my father about him. This time I was very open and straight up with him. He then told me that he did sleep with this woman but to his understanding the woman was already pregnant for another man.
I found that to be very disgusting and outrageous and I told him to his face that he is worthless and that doesn't make him an exception to being that child's father. I believe he is now in his early 20s like me. I want to know for a fact if he is my brother.
My question is: how do I go about getting this done without my father knowing about it? I know he is not going to agree to do a DNA test. I believe I deserve to know the truth. He should know too, since he lost his mother.
D. W., Philadelphia, USA
Dear D. W,
Whatever you would like to do, I suggest that you discuss it with your father. You cannot expect your father to appreciate your suggestions if you demand that such and such be done. He is your father and whether you believe that he is right or wrong, you should always be respectful to him. It is easy to do a DNA test in Jamaica.
Pastor
Frankly, you have accepted this guy as your brother and whether or not a DNA is done shouldn't change the relationship that you have established with him. It is easy to do a DNA test in Jamaica. If you love and respect your father, you should tell him how you feel and seek his co-operation in the matter.
Pastor
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