Dear Pastor,
I've been with this guy on and off for a long period of time. I'm 19 and we're not together any more but we still talk. The problem is that he claims that he still loves me and we should let time tell if we will get back together or not. Well I think time is well over due and he's wasting my time.
What do you think, Pastor? I still love him and we have a long history together, but I'm confused.
A. F.
Dear A. F.,
Stand your ground. Don't let him use man talk to recapture your love, so to speak. Some people make the mistake by believing that because a couple may love each other, they should have an intimate relationship. However, they are wrong. People are not to become intimate simply because they love each other. There are other factors that should be taken into consideration. And in fact, what some people call love is not love at all.
Many people have ended up with broken hearts because before they got married they only thought about the love they had for each other. After they got married, they discover that they were not compatible. And I use the word compatible, cautiously because it can be argued that very few people are compatible. But let me tell you what I mean.
When a woman is looking for a man, she should seek a man who is on her level or pretty close. She should check out his relatives and watch how he relates to them. Does he love his parents and care for them? Is he a spendthrift? What about his educational standard? Does he practise good hygiene? Is he employed? Is he helpful? Is he refined? Is he hard working? Is he independent? Lots of men fool women because they claim they are good lovers in bed. Intelligent women look beyond that.
Pastor
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