Tell Me Pastor

LYING IN WAIT

DEAR PASTOR,

There is a girl that I like, but she lied to me in the past about her not having a boyfriend. When she first arrived on campus she was very shy, kept to herself and modest.

When she told me that she had a boyfriend, it broke my heart. I was extremely sad. Since then we have got really close. I do not know what to do. I am confused with different feelings. I do not know if she likes me, and so I am afraid to ask her out.

This girl 'got it going on'. She has a wonderful personality, she is beautiful, intelligent and has everything that I am looking for in a woman. I really want to be with her. I am afraid that she will reject me.

I cannot be compared to her. She is just so magnificent. Right now she does not have a boyfriend, and I do not want to make it seem like I am a dog.

What should I do? Do you believe that I should tell her, or should we just continue to be friends? She told me that she only dates Jamaicans, but I am American. Do you believe that she will change her mind? I await your response.

J.F., Ohio, USA

Dear J.F.,

Stop punishing yourself. Invite this lady on a date and see how she will react. Continue to be a real gentleman with her. You never can tell, she might become very interested in you. She says she only dates Jamaican men, but that might just change.

If she is not interested in going on a date with you, don't push the issue.

Please remember that having a date with a young woman does not necessarily mean that it has to develop into anything intimate.

Unfortunately, some men believe that when women go on dates with them, the women are indicating that they wish to have a lasting relationship with them. These men are so very wrong. A woman may go on a date with a man and will never go back on another date with him. If that happens to you, don't be discouraged, it may be her loss, plus there are many other apples on the tree.

Pastor