Tell Me Pastor

Loving a married woman

Dear Pastor,

I am a single man living in America. A couple years ago, I had the pleasure of going to Jamaica where I met a young woman who I fell in love with. I visited a few times and was making plans to marry her and take her to America with me.

On my last visit, she told me that she loved me. She also told me that she is married to a Jamaican who is currently in prison. I am not sure what to do now. I care about her but I feel that there are other things that she is hiding from me.

Do I go through with this relationship? Getting married in America will not be a problem. Or should I demand that she divorces her current husband in Jamaica first? Please tell me what to do.

D. R., California, USA

Dear D. R,

Why would you want to continue the relationship with this woman when you know that she is married? When you first met her you did not know that she was married, so no one should hold that against you. But now that you know that she has a husband, you should end the relationship.

Perhaps this woman did not know that both of you would have become emotionally involved. Therefore, she did not tell you when she first met you that she is married. I am prepared to give her the benefit of the doubt, although I believe that she should have declared her hand from the very outset.

Could it be that she was trying to get a little money out of you? It may also be that she wanted a man to wine and dine her considering that her husband is locked away in prison.

Anyway, my friend, I cannot encourage you to go further with this relationship. You are quite correct, she may surprise you with some more information. So walk away while you can.

Pastor