Tell Me Pastor

Torn between two lovers

Dear Pastor,

I am a 21-year-old female living in New York with what I consider to be normal problems. I am caught between two men that I care for very much. One lives rather close to me and the other lives in another country. Both guys are fairly nice and loving people and it would break my heart if I had to hurt any of them.

The guy who is living far away, I have known for over four years but the guy who lives close to me I have known him for only a month or two but somehow I have grown closer than I thought I ever would. My problem is that I need to make a choice without hurting any one of them and I don't want to make my decision based on my physical feeling towards that person.

What should I do?

T. M., New York, USA

Dear T. M,

I can't speak on the matter intelligently. You have not said enough. The only comment that I would make is that, knowing a guy for a couple of months is not long enough to decide whether he would make you a suitable spouse. That is too short a period of time to make an intelligent decision.

Pastor