Tell Me Pastor

Scarred for life

Dear Pastor,

I am now an adult but some of my memories still haunt me.

When I was 16 years old I was forced by a guy to have sex, and he soon became my boyfriend. Every time we were to have sex it was forceful. He never listened or waited. I got pregnant and I also lost my virginity to this guy. I was a Christian at the time and believed in marriage before sex but that was impossible because of this guy. My mother died when I was 11. My father didn't care much, only that we were not hungry or naked.

Abortion

We decided to have an abortion. I did but my boyfriend didn't care less about me. He soon caused me to get pregnant again. I did another abortion but before it happened the doctor was there having sex with me while my legs were open. I didn't do anything about it. I was afraid to expose him because everybody would know about the abortions.

My boyfriend couldn't stand the fuss for sex so he left for the Bahamas for three years and didn't return. He left me with pains and scars and I wish to God that I didn't know him.

Please tell me what to do. I am really frustrated.

...,

Jamaica

Dear ...,

I want to assure you of my prayers. And I don't want you to think of yourself as a bad girl. You were naïve at the time you got involved with this young man. I am not condemning you for having the two abortions. At the time you thought that was the best thing to do and you did not have proper guidance. I want you to learn to forgive yourself and to accept the love of God in your life.

It is so difficult to comprehend what you said about this medical doctor. I don't doubt you that it happened. I have had complaints from women about medical practitioners. Every profession has bad eggs.

I want to encourage you to turn over your life to God. I believe also that you need professional help. You need to meet in person with a family counsellor who would not condemn you ,or make you feel like you are the greatest sinner and that your soul is doomed to hell. I will write you and tell you where to go for professional help.

To protect you, I am withholding your initial and parish. May God bless you. Make sure you read your Bible, pray and attend church as often as possible.

Pastor.