Tell Me Pastor

Betrayed by friend and beau

Dear Pastor,

I am a 22-year-old female and I was in a relationship for the past two-and-a-half years. In July of last year, we separated because he became involved with my friend.

It all started in January last year when I suspected that something was going on between both of them. I asked her about it and she said no, so I didn't ask her again. I took her for my friend and she betrayed me in a most disgraceful way. Anytime I mentioned her name or said anything about her, my boyfriend would either hit or curse me for her, so I stopped dealing with her.

I was home one morning and he was leaving for work and he told me that he was leaving. I was home the entire day and there was no sight of him coming. He came at 10:30 that night and I asked him where he was coming from and he said that he was his own big man and I should not question him or ask him anything at all.

I asked him why was it always about her and not me and he punched me in the face and it was swollen for days. I had to stay in for days and since then he just kept beating and cursing me for her. He even told me that he is having sex with her and he is not going to stop. I asked him if they were in a relationship and he said he's not saying yes and he's not saying no.

Falling in trap

She is making my life a living hell and he is falling in her trap. People say that I should obeah her and I feel like doing it. I am fed up with the situation because she came into my life and made it miserable. Enough is enough. I am not blaming her alone because it is the two of them that betrayed me and I don't think that is fair at all. I know that I am a very loving and understanding person and was very faithful to him, so why did he have to sleep with her? I trusted her and they let me down.

Anytime I call him he is always with her and when I ask him to spend some time with me he says that he has to work. But he still finds time to take her out and I am always at home. I just want to know if she is not going to pay for the damage she has caused in my life.

Tell me what to do, because I am lonely, unhappy and sad.

Initials withheld,

St. Catherine

Dear ...,

You should not go back to this man. He has not treated you well. He has verbally and physically abused you. No woman should stay with a man who beats her.

As for your girlfriend, her day will come. She was not a good friend. She shouldn't have got sexually involved with him. It is going to be hard for you to forgive both of them but ask God to give you the grace to do so.

I am really sorry to hear what you are going through but God is not dead. He may allow you to get a much more caring and loving man. Put your future in God's hand.

Pastor.