Commentary

Buy local by whom?

JACKASS SEY DI worl' no level. Jackass sey dem a talk bout people fi buy local, but de same big man dem a buy bare farin sinting.

Jackass has been looking at this 'buy local' campaign and having a rahtid bray. I mean, this is downright funny. Buy local? In a country that imported dirt to do over one of its international airports?

Whe dem tek Jackass fah? Ol' goat?

So you all are supposed to buy local as much as possible, to prop up the economy. Fair enough. It needs lots of propping up and, trust I, too much pressure on the donkey back, OK? Buying local is great, and it does not even have to be something huge, something massive. No. It means buying the local spring water instead of the imported one. And the locally made athlete's foot cream instead of the foreign one.

And shoes and handbags from Leder Mode. And cars from Excel Motors, that makes the island cruiser. And suits from Spencer's Tailoring. Those are just some of the little things that add up to a big saving on foreign exchange.

So, Jackass wants to know, if the people are being advised ­ no, begged ­ to buy local, how comes the government ministers are ferried around in SUVs and Volvos? What could make a bigger statement than when Parliament is in session, there is a line of Island Cruisers outside Gordon House on Duke Street? Can you imagine the pictures, the newsreels, especially if the Parliamentarians come out, put on 'buy Jamaican' caps and drive away?

Can you imagine if they were doing this in Leder Mode shoes?

Now that would be a start.

The overwhelming majority of us have no choice but to 'buy local' when it comes on to health care. If it is not an emergency, we head to the doctor. If something goes rip or drip in the night, we head to the hospital. And wait. And wait. And wait.

But Jackass has done the wait more than one time and has not seen any of the people who really run Jamaica up there. So, do they buy local with health care? Hell no! Off to Miami we go! And don't tell me about the Tony Thwaites Wing either. That is farin to most of us pockets.

Jackass goes to Coronation on a regular basis too (more regularly before 'Ivan', of course), and he has never seen leaders of government or private sector down there asking for a five pound weight of Trelawny yam, or asking if "a local honihon dat?"

And don't tell me that the assistants do it. Local shopping must not just be done; it must also be seen to be done, OK?

The world can't be level when those encouraging us to buy local are buying farinical? When they are buying Post cereal over Grace? When they are buying imported furniture over the ones made near the beginning of Port Royal Street? When they are buying Streisand over Buju?

And there is another thing too. When we buy local, how do we know that those who own the companies that make the products we buy are not shipping the money overseas, either to bank it or to buy foreign goods?

Jackass sey di worl' no level. Jackass sey man a drive cyar from foreign, no man naa drive dray cyart pulled by soup up Jackass.