Tell Me Pastor

Playing with fire

DEAR PASTOR,

I am an 18-year-old Jamaican girl currently living in England. I met a guy who is also from Jamaica and I gave him my telephone number. He rang me and told me he wanted to take me out but as I am currently studying for my examinations I told him to wait until after I did them and he said that it was fine.

We both have a mutual friend through which we initially met. She doesn't know that he asked me out so I have been inconspicuously trying to find out things about him. I got to understand that he is going out with her sister and that he is married with two children. However, I really like him, but the fact that he didn't even mention his kids have me even more confused. I know that men lie and if I confront him about his marriage more than likely he will say something along the lines of them being separated.

As I am only 18 years old I have this view that I need to experience life before settling down, so I see this as harmless fun. Should I confront him or should I just pretend that I know nothing of his private life and embark in a relationship with him?

Initials Withheld., England

Dear --,

Getting involved with this man would not be harmless fun. You would be playing with fire and before you know it, you would be burnt. Now that you know so much about this man, you should tell him that you are not interested in him.

This man is married and has two children and he is going out with the sister of your friend. And now he is interested in going out with you. He is playing around and you must not kid yourself. You will get into trouble. If he should ask you why you do not want him in your life, tell him that he is playing around with other women. And you do not want to be one of his girls.

Pastor